The reality of being an intern.
"So what time do we have to come in?" asked one of the res year students.
"Oh, 7ish will be fine for you medical students," said Katie the cute blonde intern I was assigned to.
Then she looks at me.
"And you, see you at quarter past six tomorrow morning, we have rounds to do,"
615am. Brilliant. Just brilliant
.Bestnye jadi intern bestnye jadi intern.
Oh stoma
"So tell me what that is," asked Ronan, the specialist registrar in the urology team.
It was in the right iliac fossa. It had what appeared to look like a spout. I went for it.
"Loop ileostomy", I cried with disregard to the fourth med student standing beside me.
"Loop ileostomy", I cried with disregard to the fourth med student standing beside me.
The patient coughed. Straw coloured liquid started to dribble out of his stoma.
(Insert preferred swear word)
"Oooh ileal conduit," I said this time knowing that the sort of impatience and carelessness I had shown would've cost me a lot in my upcoming exams.
"Oooh ileal conduit," I said this time knowing that the sort of impatience and carelessness I had shown would've cost me a lot in my upcoming exams.
It was indeed an ileal conduit. But the way I jumped into a conclusion was deplorable.
This is how you learn.
“See one, do one, teach one.”
Sarah was all about teaching me to do stuff. She was the other intern also on the Urology team.
I watched her do a few cannulas. Then she gave me a minute’s runthrough on what to do.
“Now, are you ready?”
“Yeah I’ll give it a go,” I said, aware that I had no clue what was going on.
Wipe wipe, Tap tap, needle in, needle out. I got it on my first try.
“Good man, now you can do them on your own,” she echoed in the background.
Cannula technique. Check.
Oh, I grabbed a few cannulas to bring home. Gonna try to self cannulate.
Or I could just manipulate a few first years into volunteering their arms. Oh those lovely juicy veins!
ECG
“Do you know how to do an ECG?” asked Katie, who was really starting to grow on me.
“Yeah, I think I still remember,” I confidently answered
Except that my ECG guru was Tom. And true to his nature, he taught me a foolproof method that apparently never failed.
Just follow the fecking diagram.
After what had happened back during my baby res year (click here if interested) I was a bit apprehensive about performing ECGs. The show had to go on.
I failed my first attempt, as lead II showed that the patient had flatlined when he was clearly up and about chatting away.
I had to call in Katie to re-teach me how to do it the PROPER way. It’s all in the anatomy.
ECG number five
“You didn’t even have to look at the diagram like the other person,” said my patient.
She was lying on two pillows with her top off, totally relaxed at my apparent competency in placing the leads on her chest.
Small talk was the order of the day. It kept the patient distracted and creates the so called rapport the text books have been banging on about.
“So, are you nervous for your operation tomorrow?” I asked, knowing that she was about to have a CABG, ie operation on the heart. It was a major operation.
“Whhaat?! What operation?,” She exclaimed looking worried.
Right on cue, Katie pops her head in the cubicle,
“Oy, wrong patient, it’s the other bed,” she said menacingly.
Sure enough, I realized I was at the wrong bed. So no, she wasn't meant to have a CABG, ie major heart surgery.
Oh, I did patch things up with the patient.
It’s just one of those things you never ever want to bring up again. Ever.
“You look exactly like my grandson. He lives in London. A very good looking lad like yourself,” said the elderly patient. (Yes, muka aku hensem and macam mat salleh woo)
“His father is of Indian origin, are you from India as well?” he asked.
Aww snap.
Not everything’s hunky dory but….
I guess there were a good few up and downs in my first three days as a sub-intern. I do not wish to elaborate on the downside, safe to say, just move on and deal with it. Good life motto right?
